Helping Your Child Adjust
When your child starts preschool, it’s normal for both of you to be excited. It’s also normal for each of you to experience some anxiety, perhaps at the same time, you’re feeling that excitement. When it’s time for your child to start preschool, it can be a big change. Fortunately, though, there are plenty of things you can do to help him or she adjust.
Transitioning your child into Preschool can feel tough — not only for them but also for you as well.
For a preschooler, this means a change in routine, a step into the unknown, and time away from parents or caregivers. For parents, it’s questioning a decision, being calm during a meltdown, and trying not to cry during drop-off. With a little planning, taking your toddler to child care can be a positive and rewarding experience. Here are a few tips on how to help a toddler adjust.
Prepare Yourself for Preschool
Understanding how to help a toddler adjust to Preschool starts with you. Children sense your moods. They know when you’re anxious or uncomfortable. If you are uncertain about your decision, your child may be more hesitant about preschool. Be calm and confident when talking about transitioning to any child care. You’ve got this! You wouldn’t be a parent if you didn’t worry about what’s best for your child. It’s natural to talk through your concerns with friends and family. Just remember, preschool opens your child’s eyes to a beautiful world. A wonderful place for your child to grow, learn and develop new and fulfilling relationships with caretakers and friends outside of the family.
Create a Consistent Routine
Children thrive on routine. They need to know what to expect and what is expected of them. Create a consistent morning ritual – having breakfast together, packing his lunch, preparing for school, happily departing home, and saying hello to the new teacher before saying goodbye to each other.
Make a Prompt Departure
The first few days of school, you may have stuck around a little longer to help ease your child's anxieties and help them to feel safe and comfortable in a new environment. Now that they have a few days or weeks under their belt, it's time to say a prompt goodbye. Give a loving hug or kiss, assure your child that they'll have a wonderful time at school and that you will return shortly…and promptly leave. Your child will soon come to accept that that's how the separation plays out. Sticking around to comfort your child only prolongs the goodbye, making it tougher on everyone involved.
Don’t Sneak Out
Leaving without saying goodbye with the hope of avoiding a tearful farewell or a full-on meltdown, only makes the separation worse. You don't want your child to feel that you have disappeared. You also want them to know what to expect, including a loving goodbye.
Send along a little lovey
Giving a child something that brings them comfort during this transition. This may be a picture of the family, a favorite stuffed animal, a doll, a lovey, or a blanket. Make sure your child's teacher is ok with bringing things from home before you send them with your child. Some teachers have a policy of leaving the item in a cubby or school bag and allowing your child to visit it when needed.
Involve the teacher
Start a conversation with your child’s teacher about your child’s hesitance about going to school or anxiety to leave you. If the teacher knows how your child feels, she’ll be ready to help you with the separation and provide comforting support. Teachers have lots of effective strategies for helping little ones adjust to the goodbye, such as having a special activity ready for your child, having a helper on hand to provide extra attention, or creating a ritual for starting the day at school.
Have a “Go to School” Routine
Having a “Go to School” routine can guide your mornings (or afternoons) to run smoother and prevent the battle of getting ready. Have a scheduled time to wake up and a routine for eating breakfast, getting dressed, brushing teeth, and any other morning inclusions you’d like to add (like morning snuggles or storytime).
If you have an afternoon student, try a routine like taking the dogs on a walk, having lunch, brushing teeth, and singing a song while your child puts on his or her shoes. Whatever routine you choose, the key is to be consistent. This event checklist says to your child that it’s almost time for school so they have time to emotionally prepare and gear up for the day.
Gently note, to make sure this routine includes time to connect one-on-one with your child. Sometimes the battle to get them through the door can occur because they feel disconnected from you and aren’t ready to go away until they feel that safe connection again.
It’s reassuring to remember that starting school and being away from a parent can often be a tough transition for preschoolers and their parents. Kids adjust to the change at their own pace, some needing a little extra time to feel comfortable and excited about their time away. Your patience, reassurance, and consistency will help them to make the transition and embrace a rewarding new experience.
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